UNCOUPLED on Netflix

 I like actor Neil Patrick Harris. Because of that coupled with the fact that he plays an openly gay male in a new Netflix series, I watched the first two episodes of UNCOUPLED. Halfway through the first episode, I thought "Does the writing improve as the show progresses?" A writer and co-creator of the series is Darren Star, one of the talents behind HBO's SEX AND THE CITY. 

UPCOUPLED is basically Gay White Male SEX AND CITY at middle-age. This show is so Caucasian. Make that Upscale Caucasian. 

I'm a Black queer male. I grew up in South Central Los Angeles. I lived and worked in Milwaukee for years before I got a TV job offer that, blessedly, relocated me to New York. I lived and worked in New York for 20 years. Some of my gay male friends were supermarket managers, postal employees, carpenters, auto mechanics, high school teachers, travel agents, health care workers and cops. In UNCOUPLED, the premiere episode opens with the *typical" gay Caucasian male couple in bed. Their apartment, of course, is spotless and looks ready to be photographed for an issue of Architectural Digest. Cheerful Michael (Neil Patrick Harris) and Colin (Tuc Watkins) have been together for 17 years. They are both handsome and slim. Michael is chipper because it's Colin's birthday. Colin is not as happy because he just turned 50. When you hit an age like that in the gay male big city community, you might as well wear a button that says "Ask Me About the Aztecs. I Was There." Michael has planned a deluxe surprise party -- with live entertainment -- for Colin. Michael is in the high-end real estate business, showing and helping Park Avenue types sell their apartments for big money. Colin is a hedge fund manager. See what I mean? How any hedge fund managers do you know?

That night, as they're about to enter the party, Colin tells Michael that he's leaving him. He's already had some items moved out of their apartment. The items include bottles of wine and Hermes towels. Now Michael, who is under 50 yet middle-aged, must go it alone in a youth-obsessed community. He confides in his Black gal pal co-worker, played by Tisha Campbell, and two gay male buddies -- a chubby and chatty art dealer and a handsome Black TV weatherman. When these types of gay male characters in a Darren Star-involved series like SEX AND CITY get together in Manhattan to grab a quick bite and talk, it's never in a good neighborhood diner where you can get a cheeseburger deluxe. They always meet in a fancy joint where a cheeseburger is served on an English muffin, topped with Brie cheese and accompanied by a half-dozen Julienne fries hiding under a piece of Bibb lettuce like they're Anne Frank.

In the second episode, Michael feels a ray hope when Colin agrees to meet for a session of couples therapy. The wonderful Marcia Gay Harden is a hoot as a newly-single middle-aged Park Avenue socialite Michael hopes to claim as a client. There's a lot of real estate eye candy in this series that, again like SEX AND THE CITY, displays Manhattan as the playground of Upscale Caucasians.

I do have to say that Michael is a sweet guy, so far, and I can feel his pain. Maybe he is too talkative in couples therapy, but Harris plays him with an undeniable warmth.

About Colin's surprise party -- the live entertainment is the songwriting duo of Broadway's hit, HAIRSPRAY. The duo is Mark Shaiman (on piano) and Scott Wittman. I have a Shaiman story for you. I met him when I worked on VH1 in the 80s. I had mentioned that he was heavily involved with 1989 soundtrack to WHEN HARRY MET SALLY.

A friend had worked with him back in the day. Shaiman was holding a birthday party for her at his place. He lived a couple of blocks away from me in the Chelsea section of New York City. She asked me to go with her as her guest to the party. What hit me was the visual of the moment. For nearly one hour, I was the only Black guest at the well-attended party. But not the only Black person there. The other Black people were wearing uniforms and serving appetizers on trays to the predominantly White crowd. Then there were Black images. Shaiman had framed small posters of Blaxploitation movies on one wall -- movies such as COFFEY, SUPERFLY, SHAFT and TRUCK TURNER.

About Colin -- he was privileged and lucky. The last time friends in New York tossed me a birthday party Reagan was president. Colin was a handsome, rich, hedge fund manager with a partner who loved him dearly. What the hell else did he want? Did he leave the relationship just because he turned 50? The issue of gay men becoming "invisible" in the community when they hit middle-aged -- definitely age 50 -- comes up in UNCOUPLED. It's a valid issue. But it's not like Colin was single, had a dad bod and worked as a butcher at the Pavilions supermarket in West Hollywood. He was a desirable and very lucky man in Manhattan.

On my 50th birthday, a friend was going to take me to dinner. She worked for an agency that represented artists and had to go to Connecticut with a few artists that day for a special festival. On the way back, their van broke down. They had to wind up spending the night there. Regretfully, she called me with bad news, but I totally understood. However, I had no other plans. Other friends called to wish me a Happy Birthday, but they had plans. My mother and I, at that time, had a nervous relationship. She was livid that I'm gay. Even though I'm gay and I was paying her big bills -- like her moving expenses and new monthly mortgage -- she was ashamed that I was not a Married Heterosexual Best-Selling Novelist. 

She mailed me a birthday present. Inside the box was a loaf of hard, homemade bread. Why was it hard? I opened the birthday Hallmark card also enclosed in the box. In the card was a handwritten recipe from Mom on how to turn the hard loaf of homemade bread into croutons.

I kid you not.

At 9:00 that night, I took myself out to dinner at the excellent diner down the block where I was a regular. That was my 50th birthday. Colin on UNCOUPLED was lucky and he didn't realize it.

My birthday is coming up next month. I have no plans.